RIP Kelty

Kelty (May 2004-July 2013)

I really like my Kelty kid carrier. My fellow teachers gave it to me as a baby shower gift before Justin was born. It was perfect for hikes with him, and did a whole lot of overtime on our yearlong road trip. We’ve even used it with Zaner, even though it wasn’t ideal for him.

Several years back, we went to one of my most favorite hiking places: Lizard Head Pass near Telluride. I was really looking forward to the whole adventure: the meadows, being in the trees, the fresh mountain air. We had taken Justin there when he was a toddler. I envisioned the same outcome with Zane. We had situated him in the Kelty, and Justin hiked on his own. There were already complaints from Zane during the loading process. Then, ten minutes into the hike, Zaner cried. And cried some more. Wailed is probably a better word. He definitely interrupted the Zen on the trail; the peace within myself. And he didn’t stop. I loaded him on my back and headed back to the trailhead while Jeff and Justin continued onward. Zane was too upright. Too uncomfortable. He immediately quieted down when he was back in the car (the boy CAN communicate). But despite those setbacks with the Kelty, we often made it work.

Now, however, Zane is too tall for the thing. His ankles get caught in the metal bars at the bottom (see picture above). He is also reaching the maximum weight allowance for it. So what to do about hiking? Give it up? Go without him? And, if so, who will watch him? And what about rock climbing? Heading out to the crag? I’d really like for him to go.

I’ve researched other carriers. I even tried one out that a friend loaned to me. It was an ErgoBaby. It didn’t work.

There has to be something out there. Right? There has to be a way to tote a non-ambulatory child on a hike. Right? If ANYONE has suggestions, I would LOVE to hear them. I don’t want to give up hiking. Or rock climbing. I want to include Zane in any adventure he wants to be a part of. But the Kelty has done its time with us. In fact, it’s going to be sold during the next garage sale. And yes…there will be tears from sentimental me.

If you have ideas or suggestions, feel free to contact me via email, comments below, or through FB. I seriously need some help with this one. Thanks!

Bullying

My little Zane. There are so many wonderful things to say about him. Aside from being adorable and sweet, he is free of judgment and discrimination. In fact, if you know Zane, you would say he is accepting of everyone, a pure soul. He shares a smile with everyone regardless of age, ethnicity, abilities, or gender.

Fortunately, we live in a town where Zane is accepted for who he is. And, so far, he has not been mistreated or bullied because of his cognitive and physical differences. However, these things weigh heavily on my mind.

I will never forget an incident that occurred back in 2008 at the Denver Zoo. A group of adolescent boys passed Zane, pointed at him, and laughed. Now I had been bullied, picked on, teased when I was a kid, so I know first-hand how painful the experience can be. But the ridicule on that day at the zoo stung so much more because it was aimed at my son. My son who did not have the voice to defend himself. The son who would gladly offer those kids a smile if they took the time to receive it.

By the time I processed the string of events, the moment to react had already passed. The kids were gone. In retrospect, I realized their cruelty had everything to do with their own insecurities and nothing to do with Zane.

If you are a viewer of Glee—as I am—you will recognize Lauren Potter in this video. She plays Becky. Her message is a worthy one. Please share her message with others. Our world needs more kindness and less bullying.

Teeth Grinding

Bruxism. That’s what it’s called. It’s the official name for teeth grinding, and Zane does it almost all the time. It absolutely drives me crazy, especially when I am trying to write or when I am driving. Zane’s pediatric dentist said it is quite common to see habitual teeth grinding in kids with special needs. Likely, it provides him with some sort of stimulation (via the sensation or noise) that does not prove irritating to him in any way. To save my nerves (and his teeth), I have offered him the use of a pacifier. This is something I absolutely discouraged with Justin. I did not want Justin to develop a reliance or oral fixation. And he didn’t. But with Zane, the pacifier is a means of making everyone happy. He enjoys munching on the pacifier, and I do not cringe as often at the sound of enamel on enamel. It’s a good compromise. Of course there are times, even with the pacifier, that he prefers to grind his teeth. I guess you can’t win them all.